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The Tenacious Mama: Confessions of An Adoptive Mother
I’m currently on the roller-coaster ride of single parenting an adopted teenage son. Join me each week as I share my lived experience by starting with a confession, in the hopes of normalizing the complex issues that often come with parenting an adopted child.
Episodes
21 episodes
E21: The more I learn, the less I know
Confession: I am constantly reminded that the more I learn, the less I know. This week that lesson came in the form of videos on vestibular and proprioceptive systems. What I learned in these videos was super inf...
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Season 1
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Episode 21
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26:36
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E20: The embarrassing shoe throwing incident
Confession: Before I was introduced to TBRI, I once had an epic meltdown, which included throwing all of my shoes on the floor of my bedroom in a rage. I threw every single pair of my shoes as hard as I could onto the hardwood floor wh...
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Season 1
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Episode 20
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24:25
E19: I wish I had found TBRI sooner!
Confession: I wish I had found TBRI Trust Based Relational Interventions when Lane was in Kindergarten instead of 8th grade. In my humble opinion, it is THE SINGLE MOST POWERFUL intervention program foster and adoptive families ...
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Season 1
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Episode 19
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35:08
E18: Let that shit go!
Confession: Reliving Lane’s Kindergarten year has been much more difficult than I imagined it would be. Luckily, it didn’t seem to have any lasting impact on Lane. In fact, he doesn’t remember any of it!
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Season 1
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Episode 18
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27:19
E17: I was so optimistic and naive
Confession: Rereading my blog entries about Lane’s adoption day makes me a bit sad. I was so optimistic and naive. I never would have imagined ending up where we are now. I share two blog entries written right be...
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Season 1
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Episode 17
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29:43
E16: I used to be proud to be a teacher...
Confession: I used to be proud of my career in elementary education…until I had a child who didn’t fit the mold and only then realized how the kids on the ends of the bell curve were not thriving. And in many cases, kids like mine are ...
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Season 1
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Episode 16
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31:10
E15: My own worst enemy
Confession: I used to be my own worst enemy with negative self-talk that I wasn’t even aware I was engaging in. Now that I know, I’m working to becoming my own best friend with self-compassion, self-love, and positive self-talk. ...
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Season 1
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Episode 15
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24:08
E14: I swear a lot!
Confession: I swear a lot. Well, maybe not a lot, but I definitely swear. Some believe that it’s healthy for you to get it out, but, like all things, only in moderation. Also included: stories from my childhood, more ab...
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Season 1
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Episode 14
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29:13
E13: I had no idea how to process uncomfortable emotions...until recently
Confession: I didn’t learn how to process my emotions until my mental health crisis when Lane was in 7th grade. To those of you who are emotionally healthy, that may sound crazy. But it’s true. I share how music therap...
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Season 1
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Episode 13
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28:55
E12: I suffer from depression
Confession: I suffer from depression: major depressive disorder. But because I am high-functioning and an extrovert, very few people in my life know this about me- even many close friends and family members. I reflect...
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Season 1
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Episode 12
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23:05
E11: Woefully underprepared
Confession: Despite my extensive background working with children as an educator, I was woefully underprepared to parent a child with developmental trauma. Also included are stories of Lane's dancing abilities and how they showed ...
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Season 1
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Episode 11
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26:27
E10: Comparison is the thief of joy
Confession: In those early years, I often looked at other families and thought, “It must be nice to have a kid who…” (dot, dot, dot, fill in the blank). I still catch myself doing it sometimes, even now. But comparison is ...
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Season 1
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Episode 10
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31:16
E9: To medicate or not to medicate? That is the question...
Confession: I can’t imagine what it would have been like to parent my son without the help of medication to manage his symptoms of ADHD and ODD. I explain that although I am no expert and I believe this is a decision not to be take...
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Season 1
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Episode 9
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24:53
E8: I don't have a daddy!
Confession: When Lane was little, not having a daddy was much harder on him than being adopted was. As a single adoptive mama, this was not something I was prepared for. I also provide an update on my parents as...
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Season 1
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Episode 8
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29:31
E7: Devastating loss...no confession today
Due to the recent and very sudden loss of my family's home of almost 40 years in the Pacific Palisades fire, instead of a confession, I will be reflecting on the memories that made their house a treasured home. If you know others who hav...
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Season 1
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Episode 7
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33:39
E6: I wanted a child who looked like me
Confession: I wanted to adopt a child who looked like he or she could have been my biological child. In this episode, I also share my preferences for a child when going through the matching process, my blog from the day I brought h...
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Season 1
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Episode 6
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23:47
E5: I made contact with Lane's birth mother...
Confession: Last week I made contact with Lane’s birth mother for the first time. I had no idea what to expect, but after meeting with her, I am cautiously optimistic that when he meets her and builds a relationship with her, it will b...
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Season 1
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Episode 5
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34:03
E4: I became a mother for selfish reasons
Confession: I became a mother for selfish reasons, not necessarily that I wanted to give a child a better life. When Lane was little, people would often say, "He's so lucky to have you!" and my response was, "No, I'm the lucky one.&nbs...
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Season 1
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Episode 4
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31:16
E3: It's not your fault, but it IS your responsibility
Confession: I started telling my son, “It’s not your fault you have all these cards stacked against you. However, it is your responsibility to figure it out and be a good person.” I will detail the many layers of Lane's traum...
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Season 1
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Episode 3
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28:43
E2: I might punch ‘em in the throat!
Confession: When Lane was in middle school and exhibiting extreme behaviors almost daily, I told friends, “The next person who says, 'there is a special place for you in heaven,’ I might punch ‘em in the throat.” I wil...
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Season 1
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Episode 2
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32:11
Overview + Confession: Raising You Is Killing Me
In this first episode, I share an overview of my parenting journey as an adoptive mother thus far. Additionally, I go into detail about my first confession: I used to say that I should write a book about my parenting journ...
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Season 1
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Episode 1
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24:19